So: I got mugged last night. Gunpoint and everything. Right there in THE LAND OF THE DOUBLE BONE HARD NIGGAZ. Man. I thought I was down with those guys. I was walking home from the train a little after midnight, thinking about a book I've been reading about a family who are shocked by a death of someone close to them, and how awkward grief can be, and I was trying to remember how I'd acted during the two situations in my life when someone close to me died. If I hadn't been trying to improvise the eulogy I never delivered for a friend who died years ago, I probably would have had better composure when the guy in the ski mask leaped out of the alley and jabbed the barrel of a gun into my stomach. But, you know, maybe not. I don't even remember what he said. I just remember thinking that he seemed to be more interested in killing me than anything else. I said, "Shit!" Then I gave him my wallet, hoping he would prefer that to shooting me. He told me to run. I did, although it was more of a lope, because I was too distracted to run. I heard him go back into the alley, laughing. I was about halfway down the block when everything finally registered, and then I nearly lost it. I spun around so fast I almost fell down and I said, "I'll tell you a joke", and I started looking for a weapon. But there was nothing, and I could no longer hear him laughing, and people walked by, and suddely my anger was without anchor, everything looking quiet and normal again, so I hit the wall, and I trembled, and then I went home to make all the necessary calls.

I only had five dollars in my wallet. I'd spent the rest of a twenty dollar bill bowling. But there were all the standard ID cards, which are annoying to replace, and a brand new $75 CTA monthly pass. And my grocery store cards. That guy is probably saving big on the fresh values at Jewel with my damn grocery cards. It should be me who is saving big. Me.

I have a slight pain in my stomach from where he hit me with the gun. My right hand hurts a little from the wall, but that's my own fault.

It's things like this that really make you question your belief in Batman.