CRADLE OF QUOTES
One sunday in the middle of october a being with sharp pointy teeth
stopped by at the Cradle of Humankind, located in Champaign, IL. She had
a book with her so that we could record the wonderful comments made while
humankind existed at the Cradle. A glimpse at the life we led for a few months of our
life. Here are her findings.
NEW CRADLE QUOTES! 4-21-01
"Figment, I'm sorry. If you didn't make me so angry I wouldn't have to yell." Joel
"Whining and bitching don't accomplish anything." Saul
"But boogers and porn accomplish so many things." Val
"Hope we didn't DAMPEN your party too much." Firemen putting our our bonfire.
"We have horseshoes here!? Sweet! I'm never gonig to school again!." Mike Saul
That is All Till Later
Created in March
"I only have Ďtil December to bag that shit." Samir
"Thereís no laundry in Mexico." Chris
"I donít even know her name, but I stare at her all the time." Samir
"Samir, all I hear is that you have small balls." Colleen
In regard to Saulís 15-page geography paper.
Teachers comments: "This is the worst grammatically errored paper I have ever seen."
Saulís comments: "Needless to say, my soul was small that day."
"All I kept writing about was Vietnamese Shrimp Farms. And how they are bad they are...I think." Mike Saul
"Usually most girls do not hit themselves upon me." Saul
"What is going on up there?" Kelly
"Samir is blowing his nose." Chris
"It sounds like a dinosaur." Kelly
"There's no 'd' in minner." The Collective Cradle
"Samir, all you do is create strife and pain." Chris
"Nosey people should not get deals on plane tickets." Samir
"McNown throws a second missle directly into the turf...McNown does that quite a bit." Paul McGuire
"Don't you understand, we live in a society around here?" Mike Saul
"What? Saul what the hell are you talking about." everyone else
"You know, I sometimes wish I still lost my teeth...just for the sheer idea of losing my teeth." Saul
"Talking to Willie on the front porch for two hours can take a lot out of you." Mckenzie
"Willie means it from his heart professor." Willie
"I'm drunk enough to be Jerry Lewis, but I'm all Frank Sinatra." Willie
"Kool-aid's cool, she's a baby-girl." Willie
"It's all about you Samir." Colleen
"It's always all about you Samir." Chris
"This guy...This is THE GUY!" ps that colleen girl is a figment of my imagination." Joel
"I want a wierd weekend for the Cradle...which means nothing happens." Val
"You are the greatest American highway ever." Val
CRASH BANG BOOM! "Oh crap, there was American stuff in there." Samir
"Egyptian honey doesn't go bad." Joel
"I'm not getting quoted in this shit." Peter Gray
"It's hard being a Bills and Bears fan because all you do is feel like shit." Chris
"It's hard being a Saul fan because all you do is feel disappointed and the season never ends...it is a lifetime season." Samir
a chorus of embarrassed "awwww...ha ha ha"
"The truth hurts, huh?" Samir
"Boobs are different?" Chris
"Yeah, they're like snowflakes." Samir
"I spiked a bible into this girl's boob once...she cried." Samir (Chris's interpretation)
"Everyday is Halloween to those fucks." Samir in reference to Raider fans.
"Those muthafuckas even took my beer!" Colleen, shortly after someone robbed the cradle
"Hey, Samir's on a plane right now." Val
"God speed you brown santa." Colleen